I am a midwife, childbirth educator, lecturer, doula, and natural mother of eight children. This is not a medical reference; I do not proclaim to give medical advice. Anything stated here is from personal experience, research, study, and opinion. Each woman has the responsibility to do her own research, consult with her own medical team, and make her own decisions about pregnancy and birth.

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Baby number three...Pushing could be optional!

Bismillah al-Rahman al-Rahim
Amina's Birth Story
Mountain View, California
April 7, 1999

I'd have to crown Amina's birth as my favorite for a long time (until baby number seven came along and took her crown).  Only because she came without a push!  There's just something uncomfortable (embarassing as well) about pushing while doctors, nurses, and who knows who else watches!

I hope you enjoy reading these birth stories.  Please let me know if you'd like to share yours. Now on to the story...Baby number three..Pushing could be optional!...

As I was still nursing Sarah, I wasn't menstruating. I didn't realize I was pregnant with
Amina until I felt her kick! By the time I realized I was pregnant I was in my fifth month.

I had an appointment with the doctor for a check-up on my due date. I went in on my
lunch hour. My doctor was out. The nurse checked me and told me that I was dilated to
"two" and starting to efface. She predicted that I'd deliver in the next few days.
During the drive back to work I began having pains. I didn't think much of it. I figured it
was just a reaction to the nurse checking me. Besides, I thought, no one delivers on their
due date!

Within two hours I realized that this was it! I finished my work and left an hour early. I
drove home and beeped my husband with the code "911." He came home about a half
hour later.

By the time he arrived, I had my hospital bag packed. I had dressed Khalid (now 3 years
old) and Sarah (18 months old) in their pajamas and packed their overnight bag.
We took both cars. Khalid and Sarah were strapped in their car seats in my company car.
I drove them, and my husband followed us in our minivan, to my office. My husband
waited in the parking lot with the kids as I went inside and handed the keys to my
coworker. She had agreed to take the kids to her house for the night. It was 5:30 p.m.,
closing time. I watched her frantically going through the steps to close the office. She
was so nervous that she signed her own name wrong! "What do I do if your water
breaks?" she asked.

"Call the carpet cleaners in the morning," I replied.

Once she finished her closing duties, we went outside to the kids. I said goodbye to them
and joined my husband in the minivan. We drove five minutes to the hospital. After we
parked he was rushing into the building. "Slow down!" I exclaimed. "I'm in pain!"

"Oh, now?" he asked.

"Yes!" I replied. "I'm in labor!"

When we got inside it was about 6:00 p.m. My doctor was out and the doctor on duty quickly introduced herself and left. The nurse checked me and announced that I was
dilated to "six."

I was laying on my side to labor. My husband was sitting on the sofa clicking through
television channels. I was concentrating on relaxing my body and breathing. Like the
other two births, I had worn the fetal monitor just long enough to ensure the baby was
tolerating the contractions and then I insisted it be removed.

I had only been there about five minutes when my water broke and the contractions
started coming fast and hard, relentlessly, one after the other. I was quietly laboring on
my side with the sheet over me when the nurse asked me to let her know when I was not
having a contraction so she could check me. I told her she couldn't check me; that the
contractions were not stopping.

"Don't push," she warned. "You're not ready and you'll hurt yourself."

"I'm not pushing," I replied, "but the baby is crowning."

"No, it's not," she answered. "You've got at least an hour."

"No, it’s bulging. I've got only a minute!" I exclaimed.

"Let me check you," she said.

"The head's out," I replied as the baby's head came through. I was so glad that I didn't have to push.
"No, it's not," she answered.

At this, my husband's ears perked up. He walked over to my bedside, remote still in-hand, and looked under the sheet. Sure enough, the baby's head was out. He threw the sheet off and asked the nurse if she needed help.

The nurse yelled at me, "Thanks a lot!" as she rushed around to prepare the doctor's tools.

"I tried to tell you," I retorted.

"Do you need some help?" my husband repeated.

The nurse ran to the phone and dialed a code to access the P.A. system. "I need a doctor
or nurse in here, STAT, to deliver this baby!" her voice rang out through the ward.

"Isn't she a nurse?" I wondered to myself. The doctor came flying into the room. She
began to turn the baby. It felt very unnatural without an accompanying contraction. "Can't
we wait for a contraction?" I asked.

"Not if you want this baby to breathe in the future!" the doctor screamed.

I was calm and relaxed; the worse was over and I hadn't had to push. I wasn't worried about my baby, thinking that she was still getting her oxygen through the umbilical cord. It wasn't until months later that my husband told me she had turned blue!

Like Sarah, I had absolutely no pain after delivery. Amina was born within fifteen minutes
of our arrival at the hospital. We were both released to go home by noon the next day.
Amina nursed until she was sixteen months old. By that time I was several months
pregnant with Salman...and on to the next birth story...


  1. Don't you just love when they tell you it isn't time when you KNOW it is time?! And you'd think that after working in an L&D department for some time, they would realize, that yes indeed, sometimes the mom actually does know IT IS TIME. lol

  2. Salam Alaikum, Umm Tasneem,

    Thanks for reading and taking the time to comment.

    She was a fairly young, new nurse and had never had a baby herself. Not to mention, probably had never seen a totally natural, non-medicated birth (as even many experienced nurses have not).

    But come on...when a third time mom says the baby is crowning, bulging, and the head's out...you're still going to argue with her? HELLO..LIFT UP THE SHEET! LOL

    I think her, "Thanks a lot!" comment was really funny! What more could I have said? LOL

    Anyway, thanks again for reading and commenting. I'm still waiting for your stories! (Fanning the flame.) :)

    Best regards,

    -Aisha, Natural Mom

  3. Stacey Umm TasneemJanuary 30, 2011 at 2:41 AM

    Walaikum salaam.

    When I was in labor with my 3rd child, I went to the clinic, was here in KSA, and knew I had already entered transition. I calming walked in and a nurse met me. She was looking around because she knew a laboring woman had just arrived. I suppose I didn't look like what she expected. So she says to me, "You think you're in labor,Madame?" I said, "This is my 3rd child. I've been having contractions since 7AM this morning,m and they are now coming every 3 (or however many minutes they were) minutes apart. I KNOW I'm in labor." lol. She took me to the dr who checked me and yelled, "Fully! Fully! Fully!" I was confused bc I couldn't understand her. I was fully dilated and they were running around crazy trying to get ready. It was too funny!

  4. Salam Alaikum, Umm Tasneem,

    Too funny when to see how they react to a true natural mama! What is it with third babies? LOL